


'Crawling through a Winter Wonderland...'

by Katef



Category: The Sentinel (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, First Time, M/M, Seasonal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-01-05 18:49:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21213386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katef/pseuds/Katef
Summary: Canon divergent from around the end of Season 2.In his hurry to get home to Jim despite adverse weather conditions, Blair comes to grief in an isolated location.  Can the Sentinel find his Guide in time?  Perhaps with a little help from some unexpected friends!  :)





	'Crawling through a Winter Wonderland...'

**Author's Note:**

  * For [HiddenViolet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HiddenViolet/gifts).

> Happy Holidays HiddenViolet :)

**‘Crawling through a Winter Wonderland…!’ **  


**Part 1: Lost:**  


**Somewhere in the Cascade National Forest:**  


“No, no, no, _no_, **NO! ** This _can’t_ be happening!” Blair’s angry denial rose in volume as he surveyed the extent of the disaster before him. His youthful, attractive features were presently marred by an uncharacteristic frown of deep dismay; his expression a combination of frustration, fury and no little fear as the potential consequences of his latest mishap hit home. Hands on hips, he glared at his beloved Volvo, which was presently buried hood deep in a huge roadside snowdrift into which it had ploughed after Blair had swerved to avoid colliding with a deer. It was blatantly obvious that there was no way he was going to get it out without either the assistance of a tow truck or waiting until the snow thawed, and he was ruefully aware that once again his reputation as the PD’s resident Trouble Magnet had held true. It wasn’t fair, but it was what it was, and he kicked the stranded car’s rear tyre in bitter, impotent aggravation as he pondered on his options. 

What he really wanted to do was call Jim, beg for his help and then stay in the car in an attempt to keep as warm as possible until the unexpectedly severe snowstorm abated and he could be rescued, but he already knew that he had several strikes against him. And the most infuriating and potentially dangerous one was that on checking his cell phone, he realised that there was no signal at all where he was stranded, so he was going to have to walk some distance in the blizzard and treacherous conditions until he found one, which was hardly an attractive proposition. But there was no help for it unless he was prepared to wait it out in the vague hope that he might be discovered eventually before he froze; and that in itself was unlikely since he was on a little-used logging road rather than a main route. With an angry curse, he opened the trunk and hauled out his battered duffel, throwing into the back of the car and climbing in after it, his intention being to pull on as much warm clothing he possessed before setting out on his quest. And as he donned another pair of pants, thick socks, scarf, gloves and his ‘Fargo’ hat, he muttered irritably to himself, cursing his bad luck and scolding himself for his own part in unintentionally causing his present predicament. 

Although Blair had been living very happily as Jim’s roommate for nearly two years now, far exceeding his initial promise to be out of his partner’s hair within a week, Blair knew that his best friend didn’t really ‘do’ Christmas or any other sort of seasonal holiday. That being so, when his mom Naomi had called him out of the blue to suggest that he celebrate Yule - or whatever version of December ritual she was presently embracing - with her in Olympia, he had accepted gladly. But only after checking whether Jim was OK with the idea, of course. If his sentinel needed him, then there was no way he’d go off even for just a couple of days. But Jim had agreed affably enough, and told him to go, enjoy himself. He had also promised not to use the senses overmuch until Blair’s return, insisting that he could manage well enough for a short while, and to give his best regards to Naomi when he saw her. Blair hadn’t been entirely convinced that Jim was as laid-back and accepting of his proposition as he made out, but unless he wanted to push the big cop into a moody and argumentative denial, he left well alone and made his arrangements to take a couple days’ off from the U for the visit. 

As it happened, he had spent a surprisingly enjoyable time in Olympia, thoroughly appreciating the welcome he received from Naomi and the eclectic group of friends with whom she was presently staying. The celebrations were a mix of Winter Solstice – cum – Yuletide traditions, with bits of other seasonal holiday rituals thrown in, and the anthropologist in him had been happy to both join in and observe. It was only what he would have expected from Naomi anyway, since during his peripatetic childhood, he and his free-spirited evergreen hippy mom had embraced whatever parts of such celebrations as they approved of in order to fit in with the country and culture they were staying in at the time. The only thing that would have completed his enjoyment would have been if Jim had been there with him. He would have loved to see how Jim fitted in with the group, because even though his best friend had a reputation for being somewhat short-tempered and taciturn, Blair was certain that, with the right stimulation and company, Jim would be if not the life and soul of the party, at least a pleasant and cordial guest. That thought sent a pang of guilt through him, seeing that he himself had had such a good time, and he promised himself that, if such an occasion arose again, he would do his utmost to persuade Jim to join him. 

However, when it was time to leave, Naomi had taken him aside and asked him if he would drop off one of their party on his way home as a favour to her. Unfortunately, having readily agreed, he was soon to learn that Zack Sowersby, the friend in question, lived in a somewhat remote area of the Cascade National Forest, which was some way out of Blair’s normal route home and would add several hours to his journey. He could hardly refuse without upsetting his mom and her friends, so with a rather fixed grin he said his farewells and set off for home via Zack’s place. 

The journey itself was pleasant enough, Zack being good company, and despite his niggling irritation at being taken advantage of, Blair found himself chatting amiably as he drove. However, as he detoured away from the interstate towards the National Forest, he was unhappily aware of the lowering clouds and light flakes that began to swirl about them. 

“Hey, man, is this normal here for this time of year?” he asked, a worried frown creasing his brow. 

Zack regarded him for a moment, then answered honestly. “Not really, man. I mean, my cabin’s fine in pretty much any weather, and I’m prepared for anything, but I don’t usually expect to be snowed in this early. I think it’s probably best if you stay with me for a while if this gets much worse. I reckon there’ll already be a fair amount of lying snow by the time we get to my place, and you won’t want to be tackling the logging roads in those conditions.” 

Blair nodded noncommittally, and concentrated on his driving, but he really and truly wanted to get home to Jim, not stay away any longer than he could help. He had his responsibilities at the U as well as to the PD and Jim also, and didn’t want to risk bringing down the wrath of Chancellor Edwards on his head if he could avoid it. That woman had it in for him for reasons best known to herself, and Blair really didn’t need her making his life at Rainier any more complicated than it already was. But most of all, he missed his friend, and needed to get back to the loft, which had already become the nearest thing to a real home he had ever had. 

Thus it was that, on arrival at Zack’s cabin, and despite his new friend’s urging, Blair politely declined the offer of a bed for the night and continued on his way, trying hard not to be overly concerned about the steadily thickening snowfall and the snow already collecting and drifting on the roads at that altitude. He had fitted his snow chains before setting off again, and was fairly confident that he was as well-prepared as circumstances permitted. The elevation of Zack’s cabin meant that the snowfall was much heavier than it would be back down the mountain, so surely conditions would improve dramatically once he had reached the interstate, and he still had a fair amount of daylight left. And perhaps all would have been well despite the worsening weather conditions if the fickle finger of Fate hadn’t struck again by sending a deer into his path immediately after he had negotiated a particularly slippery bend in the steep logging road. Yanking the wheel over, Blair managed to avoid hitting the creature, but went into an uncontrollable skid, only managing to prevent the car from hurtling over the small roadside barrier by a supreme, instinctive act of driving skill. However, his eventual position was precarious enough, with the Volvo stuck deep in the drifting snow, its front wheels entangled in the nearly invisible barrier and skewed at a crazy angle away from the pavement. Although severely shaken, Blair had escaped injury apart from bruising his chest from impacting against the steering wheel, but his self-condemnation hurt him far more than a few bruises. 

So now here he was, struggling to dress in the cramped conditions of his back seat, and trying to make sure he had everything he needed for a tramp through the snow for however far he had to go to find a signal. And once he had found one, he was going to call up the cavalry and get back to his car to make the most of whatever shelter it could provide for as long as he needed it.  


\-----------------------  


Some time later, Blair was to be found plodding doggedly through the snow and slush, head down against the driving snowflakes. He had no idea how long he’d been walking, but was getting pretty tired, since common sense told him that the best chance of finding a signal would be higher up the mountainside, and in these conditions, the already steep road took on an even greater level of difficulty. And not only that, but it was dark now, the lowering clouds having robbed the short winter’s day of even more hours of daylight, and Blair was relying solely on his small flashlight to keep himself on track. As he stumbled and slipped yet again, he cursed both the weather and his own stubborn stupidity in even attempting to drive home in this, and could only hope and pray that Jim would come riding to the rescue, as he had so many times before in aid of his errant guide. It was more than he deserved, for sure, but he prayed that the sentinel’s instinctive need to protect the tribe – and in particular, his hapless guide – would kick in sooner rather than later once he realised that Blair was missing. 

The trouble was that, although he had called and left a message on the loft’s phone that he intended to set out for Cascade that morning, it was before he had agreed to make the detour to Zack’s place, so any search Jim was likely to make would concentrate initially on the more direct route. When there was no sign of his guide there, Blair assumed – hoped - that he would search further afield, hopefully after contacting Naomi and her friends, but it would all take time, and he wasn’t at all sure how well he would be able to hold out if forced to stay in the Volvo overnight, or even longer. It was depressing for sure, but the one thing he was certain of was that Jim would come. He just hoped it wouldn’t take so very long, or even worse, that he would arrive too late. And if he did, Blair knew it was his own stupid fault for not calling again from Zack’s place to update his friend, but he had been so anxious to be on his way again that it never occurred to him until he was too far away to do anything about it. 

Pausing for breath, he flicked open his cell phone yet again to see if there was any signal, and cursed fluently in as many obscure languages as he could think of as once again he was disappointed. Brushing angrily at the snowflakes that clung obstinately to his eyelashes before melting and dripping into his already sore eyes, he shoved the phone back into his pocket and prepared to set off again, when he heard another sound above the noise of the blizzard. His heart leapt in hope and excitement as he made out the distant but unmistakable rumble of a heavy truck approaching from further up the mountain road, and he grasped his flashlight tightly, intending to flag the vehicle down. _Saved in the nick of time!_ he thought, grinning in relief as he saw the light from the big vehicle’s high beams through the trees, and when the big logging truck finally came into view around the next corner, Blair was ready with his flashlight, waving his arms and calling out with all his might. 

Except that it didn’t stop. Or even slow down at all. Instead, he realised in a flash of terror that it was coming straight for him, even though he waved his flashlight madly to attract the driver’s attention. At the last moment he had no option but to throw himself bodily over the snow-covered barrier, to tumble helplessly down the steep bank on the other side until he came to an abrupt halt against the trunk of a huge pine tree. Winded and momentarily stunned, he lay still for several minutes until the stars stopped flickering behind his tightly closed lids, and he was finally able to draw shallow breaths into his struggling lungs. _Well, shit!_ he thought groggily. _Could things get any worse?_ But he received his answer when he made a tentative attempt to move, as the pain hit all at once, and he could do nothing but shut his eyes again and try to work through it, his consciousness fading until there was nothing but darkness and peace.  


\------------------------------  


In the logging truck’s cab, Kurt Braun was having a very bad day. Concentrating fiercely on keeping his rig safely on the road, he cursed the unforeseen weather conditions, knowing that he wasn’t in the best shape to be driving anyway. His eyes felt gritty from staring through the windshield, but it was as much from the previous evening’s boozy birthday celebrations as from the bad visibility, and the accompanying headache and queasy tummy didn’t make him feel any happier. It was all very well knowing that this load was the last trip down the mountain until the weather cleared up. It was still one too many in his opinion, having hoped to be spared the task, but the logging camp’s supervisor had been totally unsympathetic as regards his self-inflicted woes, (effing miserable bastard that he was!) and had told Kurt in no uncertain terms that he had to get on with it if he expected to keep his job. 

As he continued to curse ill-temperedly, wanting nothing more than to get home to his woman and a warm bed in which to sleep off his persistent hangover, he caught a movement and a flash of light in the corner of his eye. However, he immediately discounted it as probably nothing more than some startled forest critter on the roadside, eyes bright in the oncoming headlights, or perhaps even the light from his high beams reflecting off some metal surface like a road sign or some such, and he gave it no mind. His full attention, such as it was, was focussed on the road ahead. His bed was calling him, and nothing else mattered but to get down off this goddamned mountain as quickly and safely as possible. He definitely didn’t even consider the possibility that it could have been a stranded grad student hoping for rescue.  


\--------------------------  


**Meanwhile, back in #307, 852 Prospect: **  


A deep frown creasing his brow, Jim prowled restlessly around the loft, unable to relax despite the lateness of the hour. Jaw clenched tightly enough to make his cheek muscles jump in stress; his thoughts were anything but calm as his inner sentinel grew more and more antsy with every passing minute. And the reason for this? Blair was late. As in, _very_ late, and Jim’s anxiety and frustration were growing exponentially along with the remorseless passage of time. 

As soon as Jim had arrived home after a tedious day in the bullpen, catching up with his hated paperwork without the benefit of his willing and capable helper, he had picked up Blair’s message and had immediately felt a surge of relief and affection. Even given the volume of traffic he would likely encounter en route, Blair should be returning shortly after Jim’s own arrival, and the big cop was truly looking forward to seeing his partner and roomie again. Although it had only been a few days, he had missed the kid far more than he would have believed possible. He might frequently complain about Blair’s hyperactivity, his constant chatter and his untidiness, but in his absence the loft felt empty and cold as if some vital life force had drained out of it. And if this was a taste of how it would be if Blair ever left him, he really, _really_ didn’t want to know. 

However, as the hours passed, he grew more and more worried, wondering what had become of his friend. For sure, for a few minutes a while back he had indulged in mentally chiding the young man for his thoughtlessness, only to immediately chastise himself for such churlish thoughts. Simon and he might frequently consider Sandburg to be somewhat flaky, but the one thing the kid would never do was intentionally cause Jim concern. So there had to be something wrong. Some reason for his tardiness, and Jim’s inner alarm bell was getting louder all the time. 

He was checking traffic reports at regular intervals for incidents on the route Blair would have taken, and so far had come up blank. There was a report of a storm coming in from the west, which was expected to bring the first real snows of the year, but it shouldn’t have affected Blair too much yet. Jim told himself that the kid was a good driver, and although he often joked about his friend’s small ‘classic’, the Volvo was trustworthy enough in such adverse conditions. Heck, it was manufactured in one of the snowiest countries in the world, so it should be. 

So where was Blair? 

Of course, by that time Jim’s fertile imagination was conjuring up all sorts of possible disasters, from car-jacking to kidnapping, and he had even called Simon to relay his concerns. The captain wasn’t initially inclined to be sympathetic, but as the hours ticked by, Jim knew he was getting worried too. And one of the main reasons Simon would be worried was that he was well aware of how important Blair was to Jim, not only as a guide to Jim’s sentinel, but as Jim’s best friend, and he was truly concerned about how Jim might react should anything untoward happen to the kid. Heck, he’d witnessed Jim in full BPS (Blessed Protector Syndrome as defined by Sandburg) mode before now, and the possibility of his friend and subordinate losing his young guide for good didn’t bear thinking about. 

As midnight approached, and snow was beginning to fall steadily and settle in the streets outside, Jim was seriously considering setting off and retracing Blair’s route himself; the need to track down and rescue his guide spurring him into proactive action. However, he suddenly became aware of low growling behind him, and he spun around to see his black jaguar spirit animal following in his footsteps, looking as pissed off as a big cat can. 

“OOOOkay, so, what do you want?” Jim muttered ungraciously, not at all scared, but unhappy to be confronted with the spirit beast again. The jag only turned up when something dire was going down, so its presence now was definitely unwelcome. 

The animal glared at him, then padded over to the cordless phone on the table, which it proceeded to bat until the instrument fell off onto the floor. Sitting down, it looked from the phone to Jim and back, plainly trying to communicate something important to its clueless human. 

“What’s that all about?” Jim snapped testily, returning the cat’s glare with one of his own. “Just who am I supposed to call, huh? Ghostbusters? What do you mean?” 

If a jag could sigh in resignation, Jim was certain it would do, but instead it stalked over to the French doors to Blair’s small under-stairs bedroom, passing straight through them while Jim hurried over to open them to let himself in. To be completely taken aback by what he saw. The jag had managed to knock Blair’s small photo album from off its shelf, and it had fallen open at a rather attractive image of Naomi smiling cheerfully at the camera. 

Of course! Why didn’t he think of that before? Jim mentally kicked himself for the obvious oversight. Some cop he was! If anyone could provide him with any other important information as to her son’s possible whereabouts, it had to be Sandburg’s mom. Feeling decidedly humbled and sheepish, he turned back to snatch up the handset, hoping against hope that Sandburg had entered his nomadic parent’s most recent contact number to the phone listings. And heaved a sigh of relief when he found it, dialling immediately despite the lateness of the hour. 

Waiting impatiently while it rang seemingly interminably, he jumped in urgently as soon as it was picked up. 

“Naomi? Jim here. Blair’s not home yet although he was due back hours ago. Do you have any idea where he might have gone?” 

There was a noticeable pause before she replied, and Jim could easily picture her fond if exasperated expression when she spoke, knowing that she would be completely unruffled despite probably being dragged from her bed. 

“Why, hello, Jim!” she said sweetly. “I hardly expected a call from you, especially at this hour. What’s worrying you, Jim? Are you OK?” 

Biting down on the irritated response he would have liked to make, Jim forced himself to contain his frustration. Naomi was just being Naomi, and even though he knew that Blair thought the world of her, he had definite doubts about her performance as a parent during his partner’s unconventional childhood. 

“I’m fine, Naomi. Or at least, I will be once Blair’s home safe. Is there anything you can tell me about his departure? His message said he was setting off early this morning, so he should have been home hours ago.” 

He was more than taken aback when, instead of conveying any maternal anxiety for her only son, Naomi simply chuckled gently. “Oh, I’m sure he’s fine, Jim! I asked him to drop off one of our friends on his way home, and he’s probably decided to stay there overnight. Don’t worry so much, Jim. I’m sure he’ll turn up in the morning!” 

It took every bit of Jim’s considerable willpower not to yell down the phone at the thoughtless woman, knowing that the last thing he needed to do was piss her off enough for her to slam the phone down before providing the information he needed. Taking a deep, calming breath, just like his guide had taught him, he replied, “I’m sure he will, Naomi, but just in case, can you tell me who it was, and where he lives? Just to set my mind at rest,” he added between clenched teeth. 

“Of course, Jim!” Naomi answered with an annoyingly girlish giggle. “I asked him to drop off our friend Zack Sowersby on his way as a favour. Zack lives in the Cascade National Forest, you know. A delightful little cabin in the wilderness! Such a dear man, Zack is. So mellow, and as near to self-sufficient as he can be, bless him. A proper Mountain Man! He’s probably persuaded Blair to stay the night with him!” 

Jim knew damned well that Blair would have done no such thing; at least, not without letting Jim know; so once again he clamped down on the bitter riposte he wanted to make and simply thanked Naomi, stiffly apologising for disturbing her and wishing her a good night. 

And as soon as he terminated the call, he cursed a blue streak, calling down all the most pesky and aggravating mischief he could think of to land on her witless head.  


\-----------------------------  


**Back in the Cascade National Forest: **  


Blair awoke a short while later to a white world of chill, his teeth chattering as he shivered from a combination of cold and shock. His first groggy thought was that Jim had forgotten to turn on the heating in the loft, but seconds later he recalled exactly where he was and why. Goddess! That truck hadn’t even paused, let alone stopped for him! What the hell was the driver thinking? He had to have seen Blair, surely? But whatever the case, Blair shuddered as he relived the moment when he had been forced to throw himself over the barrier, ruefully acknowledging that he had actually been lucky that the big pine tree he was currently leaning against had arrested his fall and prevented him from tumbling down the steep hillside, possibly to his death. But now he had to get back up to the road, and he wasn’t at all looking forward to making the effort. Nevertheless, it had to be done, so he took a few minutes to assess the situation. _Cold and wet is my world – again!_

Although his coat seemed to be still reasonably dry despite the layer of snow that had already settled on him, his lower half was damp and cold, the wet having seeped through the layers of his pants and socks and run down into his boots. His feet felt like blocks of ice, but at least he still had his Fargo hat and his gloves, and he was relieved to see the dim light of his flashlight lying in the snow a few feet above him. But now he had to move, and he knew immediately that it was going to hurt. Even as he shifted tentatively, he gasped at the sharp pain in his chest and side, and realised that rather than just bruised, now it felt as if he had actually managed to crack a couple of ribs. _Well, damn!_ And then his ankle decided to join in, and unwanted tears trickled down his cold cheeks as he gingerly rotated the injured limb. Probably not broken, but for sure it must be badly sprained, so even if – when - he managed to get back to the road he wasn’t going to be able to walk. However, lying here feeling sorry for himself wasn’t getting him anywhere, so he gritted his teeth and slowly began the painful crawl back up to the road, collecting the flashlight on the way. 

It seemed to take forever, and he was in a lot of pain by the time he finally managed to haul himself back over the low barrier, but he still felt a faint glow of accomplishment to have gotten this far. Now he just had to get back to his car and the shelter it promised, and that wasn’t going to be an easy task despite the fact that at least he would be going downhill this time. Walking or even hobbling was completely out of the question, so there was nothing for it but to crawl. _And wasn’t that going to be fun, kiddies?_ he thought sardonically as he began his slow journey, trying to put as little pressure on his ankle as possible even though inevitably it couldn’t be avoided completely. But it was his ribs that hurt the most and he hissed at the constant pain, biting his lower lip to stop himself crying out although he couldn’t prevent the whimpers that escaped every time he overstretched. This was going to be an endurance test the like of which he doubted that he’d ever experienced before, but there was no way he was going to lie down and give up. He had too much to live for now, and that was because of Jim. 

As his slow and painful progress continued – and who would have guessed just how far he had walked away from his abandoned car – he tried to keep his thoughts positive by thinking about his friend. The sentinel study subject who had become so important to him. 

Blair knew that at first it had been more a question of admiration and a large dose of hero worship for his Holy Grail rather than feelings for the man himself, and he wasn’t proud to recognise his self-interest as far as his dissertation was concerned. But gradually he had come to appreciate Jim the man as well as the sentinel; even as he had accepted that Jim was far from perfect after all; which coincidentally had made him even more attractive in Blair’s eyes. Irascible, taciturn and anal, yet he was also kind and caring – at least where Blair was concerned – and had a killer smile when he chose to bestow it, which more often than not was on Blair. He was loyal, honourable and dedicated to his job, and by extension, to protecting his tribe and particularly his guide, and as someone who had never had that sort of interest or affection bestowed on him before, Blair appreciated it more than he could say. Jim had become the best friend he had ever had, and his generosity in letting Blair stay on at the loft despite his initial reluctance to take him in warmed the young man whenever he thought about it. No one, not even Naomi, had ever shown that much interest in him before, and it certainly didn’t hurt that the man was built like a Greek god. 

Now _that_ was an interesting image indeed, and despite his discomfort, Blair’s generous mouth twitched in the faintest smirk. Although he had never really acted on it, he accepted that he had no problem with same sex relationships. Plenty of his friends were gay, and he had always gone along with Naomi’s belief that it was the person not the package that was important. It was simply that up until now he had predominantly dated women, not wanting to risk being hurt by a bigger male lover should things get out of hand. Didn’t mean to say that he couldn’t admire a buff body from a distance, though, and he had certainly done enough admiring of Jim’s even though he had to forcibly suppress any hint of arousal in case Jim should kick him out on his ass. Jim just had to be as straight as an arrow with his macho, supercop-ex-covert ops background, and there was no way Blair wanted to ruin their comfortable, platonic friendship by coming on to him. 

With a faint sigh of resignation, Blair dismissed his daydreams and dragged his attention back to his present predicament, trying to decide how far he had come, and how much further he had to go. The snow-covered road bobbed and swayed in the beam from his flashlight, the steadily deepening white layers obscuring any landmarks he might have noted earlier, so all he could do was keep going. 

He was growing increasingly exhausted, although at least the movement was keeping some of the persistent chill at bay, and he began to pace himself by counting off every hundred crawl ‘steps’ he made. And as he crawled, his thoughts becoming ever more addled and distracted from the cold and the pain, he found himself humming softly and continuously, a hysterical giggle escaping his lips as the annoying ear-worm refused to be ignored. _Dah de dah, Dah de dah, ‘Crawling in a Winter Wonderland…’_ _Jeez, could he get any sadder?_ he thought distractedly, only to cease all movement in sudden shock and gut-wrenching fear. Because right in front of him, maybe only fifty yards or so away, a huge silver wolf stood watching him, its eyes shining in the beam from his flashlight. _Oh, Goddess! I’m done for!_ was his immediate thought, his mouth drying and heart hammering in terror. He knew enough about lone wolves – presuming it was really alone – that they rarely attacked fit and healthy humans unless either starving or cornered, but he was helpless to defend himself so must look like fair game. His panicked mind tried to come up with some way of scaring the creature off, only to see it turn away and start padding slowly off down the road. 

Perplexed by its unthreatening actions, Blair frowned in confusion as it turned its head to stare at him, strangely certain now that the animal meant him no harm. Instead, its steady blue gaze – blue gaze? – seemed to convey nothing but concern and encouragement, and how odd was that? He had no idea where the notion came from, but felt the need to continue his tediously slow and painful journey, sure that the creature was watching over him. He considered briefly that he must be hallucinating, but for the moment it seemed irrelevant as within a fairly short distance, the snow-covered outline of his Volvo swam into the flashlight’s beam, and with a huge sigh of relief, Blair hauled himself the remaining few yards and with the last of his strength pulled himself into the back seat. Pulling the door shut behind him, he glanced out to see the wolf take one last lingering look at him before disappearing into the darkness of the forest. 

Blair felt strangely bereft for a moment, but then sank back weakly against the leather seat, curling up at last into as comfortable position as his injuries would allow and falling into an exhausted sleep.  


\-------------------------  


**Part 2: Found: **  


As soon as Jim had terminated his call to Naomi, he immediately called Simon to relay the information he had gathered regarding Blair’s possible whereabouts. His boss and friend wasted no time in putting through an order to the night shift in Major Crimes to conduct a search for the exact location of Zack Sowersby’s cabin, and although it didn’t take too long to get the results, to Jim it seemed like an eternity. As Simon had suggested, there was no point in him returning to MCU himself, telling his subordinate to await his call so that they could plan their next moves. After all, it was just possible that Blair was there after all, safe and sound and snowed in, and he just hadn’t been able to contact Jim to let him know. It was a comforting notion, but Jim was certain that it was wishful thinking. Even if it wasn’t for the brooding presence of the jag, his gut instinct told him that his guide was in real danger, and the longer it took until he could set out on his quest to rescue said guide the more impatient and anxious he became. 

As soon as the expected call came, he snatched up the handset at the first ring. “Simon? What news?” he barked, barely giving his boss time to announce himself. 

“Calm down, Jim!” came the rather aggrieved response. “We’ve located a Zack Sowersby’s cabin and it’s in a pretty remote area of the National Park. However, it’s not completely cut off from civilisation because it’s not too far from an area where sustainable logging is carried out, so at least the place has a phone link. I’ll give you the number and you can call immediately. In all probability the kid’ll be there, and you can set your mind at rest, OK? But if he isn’t, call me back straight away and we’ll go on from there. Here’s the number. 555-641-255. Call me back whatever the news, detective!” 

“You got it, sir, and thanks,” Jim replied, then hung up. And as he dialled the number he had been given, he couldn’t help but grimace wryly at the likely outcome. Whatever Simon believed, he knew that Blair wasn’t there, but the thought of explaining just _how_ he knew caused him to snort derisively. Simon had already been way more understanding about their connection than either Jim or Blair might have expected, but any mention of spirit animals was way too far up their boss and friend’s ‘Sentinel Voodoo Bullshit’ scale to be in any way acceptable. 

Just then, a sleepy voice answered the phone, and Jim spoke up eagerly. “Mr Sowersby? My name is Jim Ellison. I’m Blair Sandburg’s roommate and friend. He didn’t arrive home as expected, and his mom tells me that he detoured to drop you off at your place. Is he there?” 

The voice at the other end of the line was a good deal more alert when Sowersby responded, and Jim could easily make out the man’s genuine concern. 

“Er, no, Detective. Blair’s not here. He did drop me off much earlier, but he refused my offer of a bed for the night. It’s deep snow up here on the mountain, and still falling, but he said he wanted to get home. He put snow chains on, and set out almost immediately. Even allowing for the road conditions then, he should have arrived home by now!” 

Jim almost growled in fear and frustration, but managed to respond reasonably civilly. “Thanks for the info, Mr Sowersby. But no, there’s been no sign of him, so I can only assume that he must have broken down somewhere on the way back. I’ll contact Search and Rescue and go look for him.” 

“OK, Detective. Good luck, and please let me know the outcome? Blair’s a good kid.” 

“You got it, Mr Sowersby,” Jim replied curtly, and hung up again. However, before he could call Simon back, he frowned in consternation when he saw his jag rubbing up against a large, silver timber wolf. _Ye gods! Another one? What the hell was going on?_ he thought, glaring at the two creatures in puzzlement. But then the wolf turned to look at him, its blue eyes compelling. _Blair’s_ eyes! This had to be Sandburg’s spirit animal, and Jim knew it was telling him that Blair needed him. Now. 

“OK, OK!” he found himself addressing both animals. “I get it, OK? I’ll find him. Somehow, I’ll find him!” And even as he dialled Simon’s number to set the search in motion, the wolf disappeared from view. And Jim could only hope that it was going to watch over his friend, because now he knew for certain that his guide wasn’t just lost, but badly hurt. Kid just couldn’t get a break.  


\------------------------  


Back up the mountain, Blair drifted in and out of consciousness, huddling against the bitter cold. Even in his groggy state, he realised that he was growing hypothermic, but he had no more layers of clothing to pull on now. He had already painfully emptied his duffel, covering himself with as many items he could manage to don in the cramped conditions, but it was nothing like enough, especially as much of him was already wet. He didn’t want to think about it, but he knew that he couldn’t last for much longer, and the thought saddened him. It wasn’t that he was particularly scared for himself, even though he had no desire to die. He had so much he wanted to accomplish yet, and it didn’t seem fair that his life could be cut short for such a stupid reason. But he was really concerned for Jim, because even if he underestimated just how important he personally was to the older man, he knew that the sentinel still needed him as backup and companion. 

“Oh, Jim, I’m so sorry, man! I don’t want to leave you like this. I just pray that you’ll learn to manage without me, my sentinel!” he murmured disconsolately. 

As he felt now, he deeply regretted never having told Jim about his affection – no, _love_ \- for the older man, even if it might have upset their comfortable status quo. Knowing he was likely to die without declaring his true feelings for his partner, a stray tear trickled down his cheek. _Some Christmas present **that** was going to be for Jim!_ he thought despondently. _I guess it’ll be yet another reason for Jim to hate the festive season, and I can’t say I blame him!_

Suddenly, he felt a surge of warmth, and even as he embraced it, his rational self dimly acknowledged that it was probably the beginning of the end. The rush of heat that coursed through a body too cold to function any longer as hypothermia took control. He sighed sadly even though he couldn’t help but be grateful for the deadly comfort, but when he opened his eyes again, he was thoroughly startled to discover the real source of the heat. Because curled up next to him, as close as it could get, was the big, blue-eyed wolf, its thick, soft fur and radiating body heat so welcome to the freezing young man. 

_Now I **know** I’m going crazy!_ Blair thought woozily, but couldn’t bring himself to worry about it. If this was an hallucination, it was a wonderful one, and he had every intention of making the most of it. And with a gentle smile on his lips, he slept again.  


\-------------------------  


**Around the same time, at the entrance to the National Park:**  


Jim pulled up next to the Search and Rescue vehicle waiting at the park entrance, grimly surveying the white landscape visible in the truck’s headlights. Simon sat beside him, equally grim; both men now desperately concerned for their missing young friend’s safety. As soon as Jim had relayed Sowersby’s information to Simon, the captain had set the rescue mission in motion, contacting the Park’s Ranger Station to learn as much as possible about the area in which Blair was likely to be lost. And unfortunately that information hadn’t been at all reassuring. Although the ranger Simon spoke to was more than sympathetic, he explained that the logging road Blair would have had to use to reach the interstate from the Sowersby cabin was already impassable at the higher levels, such that the logging camp had closed down until such time as snowploughs could clear it. But there was no way Jim was prepared to wait any longer, declaring that he would be setting out immediately for the park. He would drive as far as he could, then hike in if necessary, so anxious was he to locate his guide. 

And despite his own misgivings, of course Simon insisted on travelling with him, at least up to the meeting point, trusting that his presence would curb Jim’s distressing tendency to put his own life at risk in his urgency to ride to the rescue by driving like a maniac in such adverse conditions. 

The upshot was that the Search and Rescue team had agreed to meet them, two of its members prepared to accompany Jim, and also to provide him with a spare snowmobile, which was the only means of accessing the road in any satisfactory and relatively speedy way. 

Desperately worried, Jim could barely contain his impatience at the small if inevitable delay in setting off while the team of three got ready, not least because he had already seen glimpses of black on white, and knew that the jag was out there waiting for him. He had no intention of following the other team members’ lead or advice, even though he could hardly explain why he was heading off in a specific direction without sounding like a madman, simply trusting them to follow him. Or not, as the case may be. 

Even with the snowmobiles, the trek up the snowy mountain road wasn’t easy, but Jim grew increasingly certain he was getting closer to his guide as the glimpses of his jag, and now the wolf also were more frequent. It was to the other two rangers’ eternal credit that after the first few minutes into their trip they gave up trying to influence Jim, and did indeed follow him, recognising his stubborn conviction and prepared to accept it on merit. 

And finally, there it was. The snow-covered mound that held the Volvo and its beloved passenger; cold, hurt but still mercifully alive, even if unconscious and oblivious to the grateful tears that ran unheeded down the normally stoic sentinel’s face as he breathed a sigh of relief and muttered a prayer of heart-felt thanks to whatever deities had been watching over his young friend.  


\----------------------------  


**Following evening, Cascade General Hospital: **  


Jim yawned widely and stretched his arms above his head, trying to alleviate some of the stiffness in his back and shoulders as his long body protested at being confined to the uncomfortable visitor’s chair at his partner’s bedside. Yet despite the discomfort, there was nowhere he’d rather be than studying the sleeping form now resting peacefully in the hospital bed. He smiled softly as he scanned his partner carefully yet again, pleased with his findings, which corresponded nicely with Blair’s attending physician’s latest bulletin. The young man’s core temperature was nearly normal again, and although his small frame was still wracked with the occasional bout of shivering beneath the several layers of blankets, there was no sign of frostbite in his extremities. True, he did indeed have two cracked ribs, which would be painful for a while, and his ankle was sprained badly enough to warrant using a brace and crutches for a few days, but all in all he seemed to have survived his ordeal much better than anyone might have expected given his condition when first admitted. 

He had seemed to be somewhat disorientated for a while, muttering restlessly about a ‘nice warm wolfie’, but the medical staff simply assumed that he was a little delirious from cold and dehydration, not particularly concerned as he had eventually settled down and sunk into a deep, healing sleep. On the other hand, Jim could barely restrain his fond grin on hearing Blair’s words, having seen ‘wolfie’ for himself. And he couldn’t have been more grateful to both the wolf and the jaguar’s assistance in protecting his guide and leading Jim to him, and for once he was looking forward to discussing the whole issue with Blair. He freely admitted that he had never been comfortable with the spiritual side of the sentinel phenomenon, but for Blair’s sake he was prepared to try and accept it. If nearly losing his guide yet again wasn’t reason enough, then he didn’t know what was. 

And it was also the reason for biting the bullet and finally admitting to Blair’s face how much the young man had come to mean to him. The thought was pretty scary, in all honesty, and he truly hoped that Blair wouldn’t take it amiss even if he didn’t feel able to reciprocate. As long as he realised that Jim wanted him to stay. Wanted his friendship and company for as long as he was prepared to provide it, which hopefully would be forever. 

With that thought, he reached out and took Blair’s hand, gently caressing the soft skin on the back of it, while avoiding touching the still red and painful-looking fingertips. 

“Hey, baby, you wanna stop scaring the shit out of me like this?” he murmured fondly, leaning closer in order to stroke the broad forehead with his free hand. “Hurry up and wake up, Chief. I need to see those baby blues and see for myself that you’re really OK. 

“And I need to tell you a few things too, so how can you resist an offer like that?” he snickered. 

Although he hardly expected an answer, he was greatly relieved when, just a few minutes later, there were definite indications that Blair was finally waking. Eagerly studying the attractive face, Jim schooled himself to wait as patiently as possible for Blair’s beautiful eyes to finally open. 

Even though it seemed like an age to the waiting sentinel, it was only a few minutes more until Blair’s eyelids fluttered, and finally rose to reveal rather bloodshot blue orbs. The young man blinked rapidly in an attempt to clear the blurriness from his vision, then carefully turned his head on the pillow to peer somewhat myopically at Jim. Licking his dry lips, he croaked, “Uh…Jim?” 

Jim’s face lit up in a beatific smile as his own blue eyes virtually glowed in delight. “Yeah, Chief, it’s me. Don’t try to talk yet. I’ll get you a drink of water, OK? But not too much yet,” he continued, busying himself with pouring a small glass from the jug on the nightstand and adding a straw. “This is just to relieve the dryness, OK? What you really need is warm liquids, like broth, which I’m sure the nurse will bring you once they know you’re awake.” 

Blair nodded and eagerly sipped at the offered liquid until his throat felt better. “Thanks, man. I needed that!” he murmured, smiling a little shyly at his partner. 

“You’re welcome, Chief. How are you feeling?” Jim replied, reaching over to take Blair’s hand again. 

Blair was a little taken aback by the uncharacteristically unselfconscious gesture, but welcomed it anyway. No way was he going to refuse any opportunity to be touched by Jim, especially in this more intimate and affectionate manner. “Ah, cold, I guess,” he snickered, his teeth chattering slightly as he assessed his condition. “And my side hurts where I fell into that tree. My ankle too. But it could be a lot worse, so I’m not complaining.” 

Jim nodded understandingly. “Yeah, I guess you could be at that, Chief. Your core temperature is nearly back to normal, but I dare say you’ll feel chilled for a while yet. Your system took quite a beating, kiddo!” 

Blair nodded, biting his lip a little uncomfortably. “Could still have been worse, though,” he agreed. “If it hadn’t been for…” then he tailed off abruptly, glancing away in embarrassment. _Jeez, Sandburg! What are you doing? This is Jim here. No way can you tell him about the wolf. He’ll think you’re completely nuts!_

Nevertheless, when the warm hand holding his squeezed gently, he peeked over at Jim again to see the big cop’s face smiling softly, his expression not at all judgemental. And was completely astounded when Jim repeated, “‘If it hadn’t been for that big, warm, wolf’, you mean, don’t you, Blair? Don’t worry, kiddo. I saw him too, and I can’t begin to tell you how grateful I am to him and my jag for both protecting you and helping me to find you. He has to be your spirit animal, Blair, and I know it’s out of character for me to admit it, but I think I finally understand how important the spirit stuff is. I might not ever be that comfortable with it, but the fact remains that if it hadn’t been for them, I might not have been able to find you in time, and I’d never be able to forgive myself for that,” he added, his expression now one of sadness and no little guilt. 

However, Blair was having none of it, particularly as he wasn’t without guilty feelings himself. It was just like Jim to beat himself up for not arriving sooner, but as far as Blair was concerned, it was as much his own fault as anything. “No, man, don’t!” he murmured urgently, trying to return the squeeze with stiff fingers that still felt like frozen sausages. “It was my own stupidity that got me into trouble, man. I should have stayed over at Zack’s place at least until the snowstorm stopped, but I so wanted to get home to you,” he admitted with a fetchingly sheepish blush. “And I should have at least called you from there while I had the chance so you would have known where to begin looking when I failed to turn up. I just never thought,” he finished, now deeply ashamed and unable to look Jim in the eye. 

But Jim was having none of that either. They had both made mistakes, but thanks to whatever power was responsible for sending their spirit animals to guide them to safety, they had survived again, the bond between them stronger than ever before. And now was the time to sound out his young partner’s thoughts on that very subject. Reaching out with his free hand to cup Blair’s cheek and encourage him to meet his earnest gaze, Jim said, “Look at me, Blair. Yes, you were foolish, but only because you wanted to get home as soon as possible, and I can hardly fault you for that. I missed you too, babe, but I waited around far longer than I should have to start searching for you. But be that as it may, I want you to know that you’re the most important person in my life, Blair, and if anything were to happen to you, I don’t know how I’d survive.” 

There. It was out in the open, and all he could do now was pray that he hadn’t made an absolute ass of himself and left himself open to ridicule. 

However, the expression on his young partner’s mobile features was far from dismissive or disdainful. The beautiful eyes were sheened with tears of joy and yes, love, and the slightly trembling smile on the full lips sent a surge of affection and happiness through Jim’s soul. 

“I love you too, man,” Blair whispered, knowing that the sentinel could easily discern the truth in his words and demeanour. “I’ve been attracted to you for a long time, Jim, but didn’t think you wanted to know. And I so didn’t want to give you any reason to send me packing, so I kept my thoughts to myself. But if you really do want me, I’m all yours, Big Guy. For as long as you need me.” 

Jim’s own smile was wide and joyous as he looked his fill at his beautiful guide, knowing now that he had finally done the right thing in declaring his love. For sure, Blair had some recovering to do before they could act on it, but he knew that as soon as they could, they would commit to each other in all ways, and if he had anything to do with it, it would be forever. And the look in Blair’s eyes promised the same thing. 

For long minutes they gazed at each other, exchanging love and wordless promises as they relished the peaceful interlude, until harsh reality kicked in as Blair shivered again, unable to quite suppress a low moan of pain as his cracked ribs decided to make their presence felt again. 

“Ugh, sorry, man,” he gritted. “Didn’t mean to ruin the moment, but I think everything’s hitting me at once.” 

“’S’OK, babe,” Jim murmured understandingly. “I’ll ring for the nurse to come by with the happy juice, OK? Take it easy, Chief. We’ll soon be out of here, and I can’t wait to get you home. And in time for Christmas too!” he added, waggling his eyebrows suggestively. 

Despite his discomfort, Blair chuckled at that. “Sounds good to me, man. But you know what? If I ever get invited to another festive gathering like that, I hope next time you’ll come with me, Jim. My sentinel. Together always, huh?” he added hopefully. 

And Jim didn’t even have to think about his response. “No problem, babe. Together always,” and he leaned over to drop a kiss on the broad brow. “My life, my love, my guide. Our future!” 

And so it was.  


**The End**  


**Author's Note:**

> Best Wishes from your Secret Santa and Mod :)


End file.
